聞思筆記

l   An ability to symbolize and model individuation

Counsellors working with adolescents require the ability to communicate their own individuation symbolically by demonstrating their personal individuality and in the process joining with the client. When counselling adolescents, the counsellor needs to join their own ‘self’ with the young person in a dynamic process (Fitzgerald, 1995). We believe that the counsellor needs to be proactive in this process if the process is to be dynamic. The way the counsellor dresses, sits and speaks can indicate to the adolescent that individuality is encouraged and respected. If the counsellor is able to project qualities prized by adolescents, such as risk-taking, resilience, flexibility, vulnerability and creativity, combined with appropriate humour and gravity, the young person will be likely to have an experience of acceptance and one that values and honours uniqueness.

Joining is clearly critical when counselling adolescents. Joining at a more personal level than is appropriate when counselling adults can be useful provided that ethical boundaries are respected. The adolescent, although narcissistic, is, as has been discussed, inquisitive, and may seek to connect with the counsellor and to get to know who the counsellor is at a personal level rather than as someone hidden behind a professional façade. Adolescents are more likely to do this if they have some interests in common with the counsellor, and/or if they recognize some similarities between the counsellor’s behaviours and ways of relating and their own. Clearly though, as stated, professional ethical boundaries must be maintained. These should not be difficult for the adolescent to respect if they are framed in terms of the counsellor’s own individuation needs.

l   Rogerian qualities of congruence and unconditional positive regard

Two of the qualities identified by Rogers (1955, 1965) as desirable in counsellors are congruence and the ability to demonstrate unconditional positive regard towards the client. Many authors since then have accepted that these qualities are useful. We believe that they are not only useful but are necessary for successful counselling of adolescents.

  Congruence When counsellors fail to be congruent, young people are quick to recognize this. They will easily identify counsellor behaviours which are inconsistent and not genuine. Adolescents are inquisitive about other people because they are seeking models of adulthood, so they are likely to be critical in assessing the attributes and behavior of the adults they meet.

  Unconditional positive regard This involves unconditional, non-judgemental and positive acceptance of the client regardless of their behavior. It is difficult, and at times may be impossible, to achieve unconditional positive regard, but without this quality the counsellor will have difficulty in creating a useful working relationship with the young person.

  Adolescent behaviours typically do not match up with the standards of adult behavior. Not surprisingly, adolescents feel judged and criticized by adults and also sometimes by peers. They tend to be very quick to recognize disapproval. Consequently, they are unlikely to talk freely with counsellors if they believe that negative judgements does not fit with the constructivist approach which demands that the counsellor work from the client’s frame of reference to explore the client’s own constructs concerning their behaviour. Counsellors need to be able to accept the adolescents’s story and constructs and it can be helpful in doing this if counsellors stay in touch with their own inner adolescent. To do this they may need to deal actively with their own personal feelings, at times, in order to stay within the constructivist paradigm. If a counsellor fails to do this, the adolescent will not feel able to talk freely about personal experiences and beliefs.

  Being non-judgemental and offering unconditional positive regard to an adolescent whose behaviour is, by the counsellor’s own standards, unacceptable, may not be easy. As stated, being non-judgemental will at times be impossible. However, being non-judgemental and treating clients with unconditional positive regard are goals which counsellors should strive to achieve if they are to work successfully with adolescents. Where this is difficult, the counsellor needs to explore in supervision any personal issues which may be interfering with their ability to be more accepting.

l   An ability relate easily and with empathy to adolescents

Some counsellors have personalities which allow them to relate easily with adolescents so that the young people they meet feel comfortable when in their presence and are able to talk to them freely. These counsellors have a natural advantage which, when combined with counselling skills and strategies, can enable them to achieve success in their work with young people. Other counsellors may find working with adolescents more difficult but can still achieve success if they have a good understanding of the processes required for successful outcomes.

  Rogers (1955, 1965) also identified empathy as important in counselling. Empathy is the ability to understand fully and share the client’s feelings. In being empathic, the counsellor joins effectively with the client, understands their constructs, and is able, at some level, to share the feelings of the client in a way which the adolescent can recognize. Although we strongly believe that counsellors must be able to demonstrate appropriate levels of empathy when working with young people, we also believe that they need to be able to disengage from the adolescent’s feelings at times. This disengagement is required so that they can protect themselves from being overwhelmed by the client’s feelings, and so that they can observe the client and the counselling process and make decisions about that process.

  It is essential for the counsellor to be able to convey warmth and caring. Although young people expect their counsellors to be warm and caring, they also tend to be tentative when building relationships and want to preserve their individuation. In order to enable satisfactory joining to occur, the counsellor needs to parallel the adolescent’s cautious behaviour and to demonstrate warmth and caring in ways which are appropriate and not overwhelming, or the adolescent’s individuation will be compromised and the counsellor may be perceived as shallow and lacking congruence.

l   象徵化與概念化個體的能力

輔導員為青少年進行諮商時，需要有在諮商過程中象徵性地展示個人人格特質的能力。輔導青少年時，輔導員要在一個動態的過程中加入自己的“自我”與青少年溝通（杰拉德，1995年）。我們認為，輔導員要呈現主動的態度，以確保這個諮商過程是動態的。按照這個方式，在坐著交談的過程中就可以讓青少年的人格感到鼓勵和尊重。如果輔導員能夠表達冒險精神、彈性、韌性、脆弱的力量和創造性的人格價值給青少年，再結合適當的幽默和鄭重，青少年將有可能體驗到一個已被驗證且具有榮譽性和獨特性的價值觀。

輔導青少年時，輔導員將自己投入到諮商關係中顯然是至關重要的。在投入時，一個更加符合青少年個人水平的尊重比在適當的時候提供道德邊界來輔導成年人來得更有效。青少年雖然自戀，但他們還是會有好奇心、會好奇地尋求與輔導員的任何可能聯繫，並期望在個人層面上結識輔導員，而不是隱藏在一個專業外觀背後的別人。如果他們與輔導員有一些共同的興趣，或者他們認識到輔導員的行為和處事方式跟自己之間有一些相似之處，青少年將更容易希望與輔導員有私交。如前所述雖然很明確，但專業的倫理界限仍必須得保持。即使青少年掀起輔導員的個人需求，對青少年的尊重也不應該是困難的事。

l   羅傑斯素質：一致性和無條件的積極關注

羅傑斯（1955年，1965年）提出兩個是可取的輔導員素質是一致性和證明對個案無條件的積極關懷的能力。從那時起，許多作家已經認為這些素質是有益的。我們相信，這兩項素質不僅是有用的，對青少年輔導的成功而言也是有必要的。

  當輔導員無法做到表裡一致，青少年很快就察覺到這一點。他們會很容易地識別出輔導員的行為是不一致的，而非真實的。青少年對他人好奇，是因為他們正在尋找成年的模範，這對青少年而言至關重要，因此他們很可能是在評估別人是否滿足成年人的屬性和行為。

  無條件的積極關注：這牽涉到要無條件、非評判，且積極接受個案的任何行為。要實現無條件的積極關注很困難，甚至是不可能的，但沒有這種素質的輔導員將難以與青少年建立有效的諮商關係。

  青少年的行為通常不與成人的行為標準相匹配。這點毫不奇怪，因為青少年常感到自己的行為被大人批評，有時也被同儕評斷。他們往往很快地就意識到不滿。因此，他們不太可能與輔導員自由交談，如果他們認為輔導員的意見只是負面的判斷而不具建構性的做法，青少年將會參照輔導員提供的框架，去探索與個案自己行為結構的適切性。輔導員要能夠接受青少年的故事和脈絡，這樣才可以在有益的情況下，保持輔導員與青少年內在小孩的聯繫。要做到這一點，輔導員可能會需要用自己的親身感受來積極應對，有時還要注意保持在結構範式之內。如果一個輔導員未能做到這一點，青少年將無法自由地談論個人的經歷和信仰。

  要做到不評判，並提供無條件的積極關注青少年的所有行為，若是由輔導員自己的標準而言，可能無法接受，也並不容易。如前所述，不下任何判斷是不可能的。然而，保持不評判和對個案提供無條件的積極關懷是輔導員要努力做到的，這是一段成功青少年諮商關係的目標。如果對輔導員而言這是困難的，輔導員需要深入探索及監督會干擾到自己接受能力的個人議題。

l   同理與易和青少年連結之能力

一些輔導員有特別的氣質，使他們能夠很容易與青少年打成一片，而且讓青少年覺得在這些輔導員面前時很舒適，還能夠自在地交談。這些輔導員有天然優勢，將此優勢與輔導技巧和策略相結合，可以使他們建立起與青少年的成功諮商關係。其他輔導員可能會比較難建立與青少年的諮商關係，但只要他們對成功結果的因素與過程有很好的理解，就仍然能取得成功。

  羅傑斯（1955年，1965年）也確定同理對輔導而言非常重要。同理是要充分了解和分享個案感受的能力。在能夠同理的情況下，諮詢師能有效地與個案連結，了解個案的結構，並能在一定程度上，以青少年能夠識別的方式共享個案的感情。雖然我們堅信，輔導員必須能夠與青少年在諮商中表現出適當的同理水平，但我們也相信，他們有時需要能夠從青少年的感情中脫離。這種脫離是必需的，這使輔導員能夠保護自己不被案主的情緒淹沒，也讓他們可以觀察到個案在輔導過程中的位置，並做出有利進程的決策。

  至關重要的是，輔導員要能傳達一種溫暖和關懷。雖然年輕人希望自己的輔導員是溫暖和充滿關懷的，但他們往往在建立關係的同時，也希望能保有自己的個性。為了建立良好的諮商關係，輔導員需要謹慎地與青少年的心智行為平行，並展現適當的溫暖和關懷，不能喧賓奪主，否則青少年的個性會受到影響，輔導員也可能被視為膚淺和缺乏一致性。